Preschool..

Let me just start this by saying HOLY SHIT.

Pardon my french.

But that's all I can really muster up to describe the way that I've been feeling for the past couple of days.

Tomorrow is Gavin's preschool assessment and I will willingly admit that I am extremely unhappy about it.

So much so that I've literally had to distract myself all day from calling and canceling.

I'm freaked out.

Completely and utterly terrified.

The very last thing I am prepared to do is send my toddler to preschool.

I have 3.5 trillion thoughts running through my head about it.

I can already feel the anxiety attack coming on and it's not even tomorrow yet.

I'm just not ready for him to go to preschool yet....

I'm just not....

Do I think he will benefit from it? Yes. Yes I do.

I think he will benefit tremendously from it.

That doesn't change how I feel about it though.

I'm scared.

Unsure.

Apprehensive.

Nervous.

Angry.

Sad.

Nauseous.

Frantic.

...and like 10 million other things.

I'M just not ready for him to go.

It's not until August yet it feels right around the corner..

Months fly by these days..

None of this really makes sense.

I'm sure of that.

I don't feel like I make sense right now.

I'm so upset about this assessment tomorrow I can't even think straight so it would only make sense that anything I write at this point, wouldn't make any sense either..

Maybe I'll blog about it afterwards.

Assuming I don't cry my face off..

-Shay